The Negev

I would have never thought that the Negev would be such an important place for me. Being disconnected from both time and electronics allowed me to hear and listen to myself in a way I never have before. I took a moment during a rest time on a summit of of the mountains and say on the edge if the cliff. I plugged my ears and focused on an eagle until it was just me and the bird and I imagined the freedom it must feel flying over endless stretches of sand and hills. 

We took a ten minute walk alone on a trail in silence and for one of the first times in my life there was complete silence inside of me, only sounds from nature around me and the crunch crunch of my footsteps. 

At the end of the whole Negev adventure I looked down at the feat me and my best friends have acheived and not concerning our sweat, stench, and filthiiness, we felt unstoppable. 

I am not really sure how to describe the feeling that breathing in the same air as those thousands and thousands of years ago did; touching the same ground that snakes use as a runway to prey, and the sight of endless sandy mountains gives you. I suppose I could describe it as unreal. But there is something even more than that. Maybe it is holy. 

Goodbye, Israel

My reading at our final Bar Mitzvah ceremony after Masada: 

I came into the Israel trip with self-aspirations to come out with a sense of who I am as a person. I don't know how I expected for this to happen seeing as we barely had time to breath between activities, but I knew there was something waiting for me ahead. I would like to share a quote by Nelson Mandela:

There is no easy walk to freedom anywhere, and many of us will have to pass through the valley of the shadow of death again and again before we reach the mountaintop of our desires. 

Us as jewish people in a world filled with prejudice have without a doubt faced far more than our fair share of walks through the valley of the shadow of death. I don't really understand why the Jews hold this difficult fate, but I think it makes us who we are.  If we would have had an easy walk to freedom, with no oppression or discrimination, would we be at all what we are today? Also, if Israel is the desire we have reached on the heights of this mountain, why is there still so much to learn and achieve?

I thought that this trip would be my easy walk to freedom. I thought that I would go to Poland and feel an overwhelming sense of understanding of why something like the Holocaust would happen. I thought that I would come to Israel and find myself and figure out my spirituality. I think that god forces man to walk through death and death again to only reach an imperfect desire in order to save us. I dont really know who I am. I know who and what I want to be in the world and what it will take to get there. And at the same time I acknowledge that there will only be more challenges once I do achieve my goals. 

Coming on this trip I now understand that there will always be struggles in life and I may not be content with their resolution, but no matter what, forever, I will always have myself, my faith and the jewish people, and god. And I think the key to figuring out who I am is never letting myself forget that those three are a part of me. 

Missiles, Bombs, and Love

With a seemingly endless flow of missiles coming from the South and more threats from the North, one might expect a group of twenty-eight teenagers to be besides themselves. Although we have had our fair share of panic attacks and tears over the probable ending of us leaving early, we haven't let that stopped us from feeling safe and loved in Israel.

I personally feel the safest I have ever felt in my life. I wake up to birds chirping and dogs barking with little kids chasing after them. Everywhere we go we are met with smiles and shaloms and love because we are considered part of the great big Jew fam. 

The amazing thing about this country is that all the people are here for a similar reason: safety from religious prosecution and the freedom to find and express themselves spiritually, religiously, and any other way they please! We went to a service last Shabbat and you could feel love radiating off of every prayer, no fear in the voice, as expected with all that was going on. After we went to Havdallah with a bunch of Orthodox women and a middle aged woman in a fully covering outfit got down on the ground breakdancing. As a teenager living in America I can honestly say I have never seen anyone go harder than those Israeli women. Peace flows through their veins. 

So, although we may have to end with some loose ends, or not finish to a full completion, there is no doubt that our group is going to enjoy themselves and feel as safe as we can in this country. 

Hugs and Snugs from Israel!

Hugs from the Earth

I woke up from my two hour long nap on the bus to look out of the dirty window to an unreal view of immense mountains of sand and a desert with wierd kangaroos and cute abnormal beaver rat animals. I thought at first I was seeing things from the 113 degrees of heat but the beauty was pure and real. Outside the opposite window was the Dead Sea, the lowest point on earth, and the mountains of Jordan past it. 

We took a relatively short hike up to beautiful fresh water springs and enjoyed every break from the heat and hot sun. It is so amazing how the climate can vary so much in one place! It felt like I was in a gorgeous South American jungle lake while in reality I was in the very hot Judean Desert. 

After hiking back down to earth we had a short bus ride to the famous and mysterious Dead Sea. Besides the horrible pain that the Dead Sea caused to everyone's unmentionables, it was an amazing experience. We looked like a pack of wild five year olds, rolling in the mud and throwing it at eachother.  I could even feel the love from the earth in the water, holding you up as a little thank you for coming as close as we physically can to its center.